The girls are progressing amazingly and are now feeding well, so well in fact that today we get to start rooming in!! Rooming in is basically the last step before going home where I check back into the hospital for 2 nights and have the girls in the room with me to make sure we can cope without all the extra support in the special care nursery. So we may be going home by Friday! Our paediatrician is really pleased she said for twins to go home pre 37 weeks is amazing! The girls have their Naso gastric tubes out so we can look at their beautiful faces!!! So excited to be going home but also a little terrified, I am so used to having someone here to ask if I have any questions!
In other amazing news my best friend who was also doing IVF has just found out she is pregnant! So excited for her after 5 rounds and 2 chemicals it is finally her turn!!
I will leave you with a pic of my gorgeous girls!
So in news just in our babies will be arriving in the next 2 weeks! Basically the OB said today best case scenario is that we will have an elective C-section at 34 weeks (next Sunday) but if my Doppler readings further deteriorate on Friday or next Tuesday possibly sooner. Either way by this time next week I am likely to be in hospital as will need to have steroids before the delivery. I am half excited and half terrified. Things are starting to get very real!!!! Keep everything crossed we can make it another week and a half!
Apologies all I have been quiet for a while. Things have been progressing well with the twins and we had our 14 week appointment with h the OB in Tuesday and booked in for the hospital.
Wednesday morning I woke up to another big bleed filling 3 pads in 2.5 hours and a severe headache. I rand the OB to find out what I could take and also what he wanted to do about the bleed. He rang back an hour or so later to say to come in and that I could take Mersyndol which I was thankful for as I did not want it to reach a migraine. An hour or so later when I was able to leave a dark room we journeyed into see the OB. It is strange walking up there I just knew everything would be ok we had seen the twins the day before and this being my third bleed I am strangely desensitised. This may be tmi but for anyone else who is or may suffer from bleeds mine are a gush (or 3 this time) with a lot of bright red blood with no pain or cramping followed by spotting. Once we got into the OB we were straight on the scanner to see both twins happily moving around heartbeats strong and seemingly unaware of any drama going on around them. There was evidence of a very small SCH which has always been the case for me despite the large bleeds. I am back with the OB next week for a check of my cervix just to make sure that there are no polyps contributing to my bleeding although I highly doubt a polyp would have been missed with the attention my cervix got over my 7 transfers!!
I hope the new year brings renewed positivity to all and for those of you still waiting for your miracle that this is your year xx
Ok I have made it to 7dp2dt only 9 days to go to my beta. Tonight is my final dose of Pregnyl 1500ui, thankfully as it makes me really nauseous! I have made the decision to test this out of my system. This is dangerous territory I know as I will have to watch positive tests fade out to negative but I really feel I need to be able to do a home test prior to my beta to give me some form of preparation for the news either way. My beta (17/4) falls on a day where I have a full day of Strategic Planning scheduled with our senior management team and the board. Getting the test done prior to this will not be an issue however once I get the call there will be no where to hide under my desk and cry or do a happy dance. Now I could opt to not listen to the message till after the day is complete but really lets be realistic there is no way that is going to happen!! So I will test the Pregnyl out and once it is out do a test a day (or two) prior to beta.
As far as the 2ww goes I am feeling pretty good, the progesterone has given me tender boobs and the Pregnyl makes me nauseous for about 24hrs after I take it. I am obsessing over every twinge and feeling a little but have a strage calmness around the result. One part of me is resigned to the fact we will be commencing a new fresh Antagonist cycle as soon as AF arrives while the other side has this weird peace that everything will be ok and I am pregnant. I can’t explain it but on some level I am calm about both of these feelings although I am sure this will change as the end of the 2ww draws nearer. My DH was really upset at me for making plans for next cycle (if needed) on transfer day but it really has helped me to know there is a plan in place if this little one doesn’t stick.
I apologise in advance to anyone who is reading this hoping for solutions to finding a balance for this as I am not sure I have any as yet. I work fulltime as the Operations Manager for a Disability Support organisation, we have 160 staff and we support over 110 people with a disability. As you can imagine my job regularly has long days and after hours calls and emergency situations to deal with but I LOVE my job. So now that we have added IVF into the mix the struggle becomes continuing to balance work and home and find the time for all the appointments etc involved in the IVF journey. The other challenge is taking the time off needed for egg collections, transfers etc without letting anyone at work know what is going on. My mum and hubby suggested just telling the CEO what is happening but the issue here is not that he wouldn’t be supportive because he would but he would also want to start planning for what would happen when/if I take maternity leave and I just don’t want the additional pressure that comes with that.
In some ways I am lucky, being in a senior role means I can slip away unnoticed for an appointment here and there for scans blood tests and the like, this issue is when I need to take days off. So far I have had to take one day off due to the large number of appointments that day, I called in sick as it was at the last minute but the guilt was unbelievable!! I wish I was the type of person who can ring in and take a day off guilt free but it just isn’t in my DNA. Next week is likely to be egg collection week and I just don’t know what I am going to do. The Specialist said I will only need the day of the collection off however I can’t drive the following morning either so not sure how I am going to manage to work that day either. Then there will be transfer two days later which are smack bang in the middle of the day and though I can apparently go back to work afterwards I am not sure how I feel about that (there is the irrational part of me that wants to go and lie with my legs in the air to make sure the embryo stays in!). If only this whole process could be scheduled so you knew exactly when it was all happening and could plan (yes I do have control freak tendencies) but alas this is not the case. I guess I will just have to learn to call in sick and just deal with the guilt and hope our IVF journey is short.
On another note I am now on day 6 so tonight start my Orgalutran shots tonight. I have been doing my own Puregon but hubby has volunteered to do the Oraglutran as it is apparently a little tricker. I am already quite bruised so not really looking forward to it. Only side effects from the Puregon is some nausea a few hours later so not to bad so far.
Ok so I thought I would give this blogging thing a go! It seems like as good a way as any to share my story and have an outlet to download some of my thoughts (as irrational as they may be at times). So here is our story so far. Hubby and I have been trying to conceive (1st time for both of us) for around 18 months and eventually bit the bullet and went to the GP to get a referral to the specialist. Our GP did some pre-screening blood tests for me and a sample for hubby. DH had to go to the GP just before our specialist appointment on an unrelated matter and asked about his results…….. GP said the results were not good low count (6 mil/ml) Low Motility (16%) and normal abnormalities. DH was really upset, men or at least my man found the results made him question his manhood and feel like a failure. It was a really tough wait to see the specialist but in some ways was good to get the results ahead so we could start getting our head around things, including the whole concept of IVF.
A few days later we met with the specialist who said that based on the results the chance of conceiving naturally were less than 1% and ran us through our options the strongest one of which was IVF with ICSI. I had an internal ultrasound, we both go referrals for blood tests and they ordered a repeat sample from hubby to be done at their lab.
We returned a week later all prepared with our decision to start IVF on my next cycle. The specialist then drops a bombshell second sample from hubby was normal!!! 38 mill count and 53% Motility………..
IVF Lesson 1 : Wait till all results are confirmed before making decisions
Explanation? could be the lab? Might have been Ill? Hubby is a cyclist so this could be effecting results? Now all of a sudden there are other options including stimulated cycles and Artificial Insemination. After lengthy discussions we opted to still go ahead with IVF but all going well without ICSI. We did consider the AI option but with a 15% success rate we decided to skip it.
So there is the history so now we are on day 5 of cycle 1. We will be doing an antagonist cycle with Puregon and Orgalutran. Day 2 I started my 125ui of Puregon in the evening. I am doing these ones myself but will leave the Orgalutran which is in syringes to hubby from Wednesday. Scan booked for Friday to see how it is all going! So that is us thus far I will try and update as regularly is as is possible and interesting.